my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
