just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
