Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
i think my mom watched the whole time
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
