I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
