did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
