yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
