I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
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