People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
