She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
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