Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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