so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
