But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
My nipple is on Facebook.
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
