I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
