its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
