if you like me you must not know who I am
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Reggie can tackle my bush.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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