There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
