I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
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