I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
