Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
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