I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
