herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
