how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
