Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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