the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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