is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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