Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
