haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
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There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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