Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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