in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
