No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize