Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
