AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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