no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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