I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
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