I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
tell me about the eggs
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
