Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
