wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
