Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize