do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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