On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
