Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
