Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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