I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
