remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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