Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize