Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
