Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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