In the future we'll all be gay
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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