I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
