Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
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