Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
