3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
try to milk me bitch
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